It's January, right?

This picture was taken on our 3rd Anniversary (December 1) and Of course by now it's mid-January, but it's taken me that long to recover from the holiday season! Our business triples around Thanksgiving and we don't look back until New Years! Justin and I are extremely grateful to do what we do, and the people we have the pleasure of serving with, but I think we both agree that the holidays last just long enough.

The week before our anniversary it hadn't even crossed our minds that our anniversary was approaching. Which is humorous to me, because we work around high school/college aged kids that calculate the seconds they've been in a relationship and celebrate reaching month by month milestones. (I could do an entire series of posts dedicated to the nuances of deep southern relationships. They, at times, boggle my mind and it's like a different time here!)

I'm thinking, that because we both forgot, this year was the best anniversary yet! No anticipation, no major plans and no expectations to meet or not meet. I do love that we have the luxury of taking off the entire day together for our anniversary and it doesn't go unappreciated. It's a nice time to get away after Thanksgiving/Black Friday and before school gets out for the holidays. We went where we wanted to go, ate at places we loved and enjoyed stuff that we like to do. It was nice.

I'm reminded of our vows that we took 3 years ago. Do any of you newlyweds ever look up and think "3 years? Really? Feels like 50!" Not in a bad way, but can I get a witness? To recap, our vows are taken from Ruth 1.


16But Ruth said, "Do not urge me to leave you or turn back from following you; for where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God.

17"Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. Thus may (K)the LORD do to me, and worse, if anything but death parts you and me."

I never wrote about or recapped year 2. It was a tough year and our work circumstance and living circumstance left us in a strained place. Thankfully, we were in the strained place together. When you work a stressful job together as a married couple half of the job is figuring out how to separate the two and learning that you always have to work on the art. Year 3 came and we both realized we had a LOT of work on our hands and we set out to get in front of our pain and resentment that our circumstances had caused. We did and now we're perfect. JUST KIDDING! Do y'all ever read blogs and think, "WOW, this person is a good fiction writer, because that can NOT be real life?" I mean really...perfection seeping from every corner of their little space on the web. That's too much for me!

Back to me. Year 3 was a year of settling and a year of peace for Lesli & Justin. It was amazing to me how peaceful and loving our relationship felt the minute our lives were settled. The tension, anxiety and frustration started to fall away. Now, having to go through the process of buying a house with my husband being 5 hours away was less than peaceful, but nothing lasts forever. He returned and we had a new lease on life in our marriage, our business, our town and our new/old cottage.

I still have unsettling moments where I think hideous resentful thoughts like, "I do this ALL for you and WHAT thanks do I get?" It's not pretty and I'm not proud of those thoughts, but I feel it's important that I be honest. After all, I am not a fiction writer and need not try and convince you that I am the perfect sexy wife married to the perfect sexy husband.

I'm happy (albeit begrudgingly) to be reminded that I made a covenant with God that where he'd go I'd go and where he'd stay I would stay. Covenants are a powerful thing and not something I'm willing to mess with. Thankfully, I have the next 60+ years to work on getting this right and I have a partner who is willing and ready to work with me. To put it simply... grateful, settled, peaceful.

PS~ Some of you commented to me on twitter that you had a problem commenting. I just did a test comment and commented as a guest instead of logging into any of the services. I put my name, email and website and it sent me the comment for approval. Sorry, if you've had something to say and couldn't say it. I appreciate you reading and being a friend!

2 year celebration!

Our anniversary day celebration was so great this year! We took the day off and luckily it was in between the wild stomach virus that we passed around in our house the rest of the week. There was no plan, so we decided to head over to Memphis for the day to shop for our angel tree kids and pick up some wedding goodies for Ali & Cody. Lunch was at Pei Wei, a rare treat for us and after shopping we treated ourself to TCBY, another delicious rare treat. We made our way home for a fancy dinner at Tupelo's very own Park Heights. At the end of the evening our hearts were full and simply getting away a being together was the perfect way for us to spend our special day. After this anniversary I think I might prefer anniversaries to birthdays, because there is nothing like celebrating our life with my other half.

Also, I like to wear something to the celebration that I wore in our wedding. Last year I wore my wedding shoes, and this year I wore my earrings. I would have worn this fur stole, but I bought it in Lexington and forgot it when I went to Texas. OOPS!

Before I get to my year in review post, I thought I'd share this fun little survey to catch you up on the history of me and justin. Thank you Sirena & Jill for letting me borrow this.

What are your middle names?
Justin JOSEPH & Lesli MICHELLE

How long have you been together?
March 2006 - dating
August 2006 - engaged
December 2006 - Married
2 years and 9 months (Married 2 years)

How long did you know each other before you started dating?
3 months

How old are each of you?
we are both 28 ~ 2 months apart

Did you go to the same school?
No

Are you from the same hometown?
Justin ~ Greenwood, Indiana
Lesli ~ Texarkana, Texas
so, no.

Who is the smartest?
without a doubt ~ Justin
he's got the brains, i've got the looks. kidding!

Who majored in what?
Lesli ~ Telecommunications, Baylor University
Justin ~ Biblical Languages/History, Central Bible College; {part of}Masters of Theology, Asbury College

Who is the most sensitive?
hmmm... we might be equal at this. especially if Biggest Loser is on.

Where do you eat out most as a couple?
Ichiban or Las Margaritas

Where have you traveled together as a couple?
Florida, Arkansas, Texas, Kentucky, Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, Missouri, Illinois, Tennessee (sounds like I'm naming SEC bowl bids)

Who has the worst temper?
ME!

How many children do you want?
We've never picked a number. Right now we have 25 grown kids that we get to take care of every day and that's managable. HA! We'd love to adopt needy kids {a la Blind Side} and probably have our own. Check back in a few years for a more accurate answer.

Who does the cooking?
Definitely a shared duty in our house. Justin is an amazing cook and I think my cooking is coming up to a new level as of late. Let's just say, either way you'd leave our house happy and satisfied.

Who is more social?
Me. Justin is naturally more introverted. I love having people over and secretly he can't wait for them to leave.

Who is the neat-freak?
Neither! We try very hard, but we clean all day at work, so a lot of times our house gets neglected. That's what maids are for, right? Currently, every room in our house is clean!

Who is the most stubborn?
Me! Gosh, I have all the icky traits. Let's work on that in 2010.

Who wakes up earlier?
Me, but Justin stays up later.

Where was your first date?
The first meal we shared together was a Johnny Carinos in San Marcos, California. Our first date as a couple was at Dunlay's on Clark in Chicago.

Who has the bigger family?
Me!

Do you get flowers often?
I do! I buy them myself, because I go to the wholsale florist once every two weeks. Fresh flowers help me keep my house cleaner. I should show y'all some of my arrangements. However, Justin likes to surprise me on special occasions with pink roses. That's what he had for me the first time I came to visit Kentucky. It's "our" flower.

How long did it take to get serious?
From the time we met ~ 3 months
From the first time he came to visit me ~ a couple of days.

Who eats more?
depends what we're eating. probably the same amount.

What do you do for a living?
We operate our own restaurant!

Who does the laundry?
We share it, kind of, Justin usually does most of it though.

Who’s better with the computer?
I don't know? People assume that Justin is good at fixing computers because he plays video games, but I know my way around.

Who drives when you are together?
Justin, because he HATES how I drive

What is "your" song?
good question... we don't like the same music, so this is hard. maybe "I Believe" by stevie wonder.

Do you ever argue?
No, we're perfect. You should want to be more like us. Of course we argue and I say hideous things that I instantly regret. One thing I know for sure is that are good to heap grace on each other and are quick to forgive. I couldn't be more grateful for those two traits in my husband.

No day but today.

3 years ago today I met this man.

2 years ago today I married him.

Today I thank God for his provision in bringing our lives together.

The Top Layer Tradition

This was the cake that my mom picked for our wedding. In picking and choosing my battles for the wedding I gave my mom the entire reception so I could have the ceremony. Not fair to me? Maybe not, but while I would have done my reception different I cared more about the elements of my wedding and those details made my wedding intimate and beautiful.

Here's the cake at the reception. Pretty, huh? It's Italian cream cake with cream cheese icing and those flowers are PINKITY PINK!


As you well know, it is customary for the bride and groom to feed each other a bite of their cake, and I wish it could have been a big old hunk of cake, because a bite wasn't enough. For this special occasion I was able to convince my Non-Cake-Lover of a husband to partake in the time honored tradition.


Is that not the tiniest excuse for a piece of cake you've ever seen? The point is he tried a little piece and obviously did it with a smile on his face! I wasn't as happy, because this is all of the cake I got to eat as well.

One year later... the time had come for us to partake in the unfreezing and eating of our cake. It got me to thinking ~ why do people eat year old cake anyway? Is it for luck or prosperity or the key to not getting divorced? I asked a couple of my newlywed friends if they ate their cake and neither of them did, and like me thought that surely the not eating of the cake meant a big ole hex on marriage longevity and bliss.

I did a little research and it turns out that back in the olden days people baked huge wedding cakes and freezed the top of them and then served them at the christening of the birth of their first born around the year anniversary of the wedding. Since the majority of people are waiting longer than their honeymoon to try and start their family people now just eat the top because that's what people used to do.

Unfortunately, I didn't find this information out until AFTER I took a bite in hopes to make our marriage the happiest and longest marriage EVER. I'll admit, it wasn't bad, but all I could think was year old cake... year old cake... year old cake. And I had a 2 day old BabyCakes By Angie sitting across from me in the kitchen.

With that information, I no longer feel bad for throwing the cake away after one bite, and if you are waiting for your 1 year to roll around, you shouldn't feel bad either about clearing up space in your freezer! I mean unless you have a christening where you'll need some cake.

reflections from the first year

Justin and I chose a passage from Ruth to be our vows to each other. The first time I had ever heard these repeated in a wedding I always hoped I'd be able to promise them to my husband, and happily Justin obliged. I love the idea of reciting scripture to declare our loyalty, and would like to start the tradition of reflection for each year more for myself, but hope that you will enjoy looking back on our first year of marriage with me.

Ruth 1:16

But Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. 17 Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me."

~Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go...

In year one of marriage was ironically pretty much always on the go. We went on our honeymoon in Florida and then spent Christmas with Justin's family. We celebrated New Years in Chicago with our best friends, The Eberhardt's, and then set out to Fayetteville, Arkansas. From Arkansas we traveled to Joplin, Missouri and then Justin left me in Lexington, Kentucky for a week while he played in Orlando, Florida. We repacked and set out for Rocky River, Ohio for my birthday month and enjoyed the infamous "Lelsi" cake. May-July was our longest stint at home, but we enjoyed many a weekend trips to Louisville, Kentucky to help out sister get her store ready for the grand opening. Finally, we were Norman, Oklahoma bound and after the longest two months of our lives we capped off the year in Austin, Texas. All those places in one year makes you miss your home a lot and platinum elite members with marriott!

~and where you stay I will stay

We started out in a beautiful home for our honeymoon that had a fantastic hot tub and pool out back and a beautiful porch. After there it's a little hard to come back to your tiny 1 bedroom apartment armed with loads of wedding gifts. Then started our Arkansas stint in the Fairfield Suites, but moved over the Value Place. The Value Place was quite an experience for us as newlyweds and one of those living situations where you think if we can make it through this, we can make it through anything! From there we stayed in the Hilton Garden Place Inn, 3 different Residence Inns and moved into our much bigger two bedroom apartment in July. We have lived there for 1 month of our 6 month lease, so far. Happily we will return tomorrow 2 days into our 2nd year of marriage.

~ Your people will be my people

I spent my first Christmas away from my family this year, and with my new family instead. There have been many times that my in laws have felt more like outlaws, and I think they might even have thought the same thing about me from time to time. After much refining and much adjustment to personalities and quirks we're getting better all the time. The one thing I have learned from shared families is that no matter how similar you are raised, you were NOT raised identically. I was asked once if I would change my in laws if I had the choice... I said it then and it remains the same... I would not.

~ and your God will be my God.

My relationship with God has changed, because while there is still much work to do on myself, I now have a partner to tackle obstacles together. I believe that whom much is given, much is required, so in committing to a mate, we take our things on together. The issues that pop up in our life seem larger and heavier when it's two instead of one. I don't say that to complain, because it has truly helped to refine my heart and my thoughts. We have both been thrown into our life situation with no direction and no knowledge... which means we've learned a fast hard lesson in being patient, but we definitely have moments of anguish and frustration where we question why God, why?

To close, it's been a deeply wonderful first year beyond anything I could have dreamed up or imagined for myself. I pray often that we will be blessed indeed and indeed I am, because it gets better every day. How could it not when I get to spend every waking moment of most days with my favorite person in the entire world?

*These wonderful photos were taken by our dear friend, Ali, one year to the day at the church where we got married. Justin and I agreed that this would be the most special gift we could receive for our anniversary.