dry clean only

i've never been a dry cleaners kind of person. doesn't matter what it is, i won't take it to the cleaners to have it cleaned. all that tag says to me is be really careful when you wash it yourself.

a few weeks ago i offered to drop some of my roommate's stuff at the cleaners. i made her write out exactly what i was supposed to say to the clerk. i don't know the lingo, i need all the help i can get.

washing it really carefully is fine and good until it is the dress. this dress has taken the place of debaucherous boys for me this summer. i think about it a lot...i talk about it a lot...i even doodle it (ok i just did that once).

well, something is on the dress. a tiny smudge that's barely noticable since the colors and patterns are so wild, and it's wrinkled. if it's going to live up to the hype i've created for it right here and in my head, it has to be perfect. after all, he is hopefully going to be my and guest. so i went against who i am and took it to the cleaners.

"Ma'am! do you see this little spot, if you could try to get that out and then make sure that it gets pressed or steamed of whatever you do here that would be great. it's silk. BUT if you think you can't get it out and you're going to RUIN it, DON'T DO IT!!! just press it or steam it. i've never worn this dress, so it's very important that it looks great."

laundry clerk: ok.

when do i pick it up and what is my total. friday after 5 i will find out if it was a $2.26 well spent. don't think i haven't already come up with a plan B in case she does ruin the dress.